Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Freedom


I'm sick of this. I'm sick of everything. My life has gone from hopeful to hopeless. I lost my job, I lost my mother who was the only person I trusted the most, and I have to deal with my asshole of a husband. I just want to run away and never come back. Why? Why does God hate me so much? If he loved me, my life would be perfect. Not a piece of shit. I'll never trust someone who just betrays me and causes me to go through shit I don't deserve. I deserve better. I'm not gonna wait all my damn life for something good to happen when I can just get it myself. I don't need God's help. I was snapped out of my angry thoughts by my husband's annoying voice. Will someone shut him up?!! "Giselle! Why aren't these dishes washed? And this house looks a mess!" When he grabbed my shoulder, I grabbed his wrist tightly and gave him a deadly glare. "Fuck off you pig," I shoved him away which he responded by back-handing me in the face. I didn't even feel any pain. Hell I'm already used to it. When my husband went to bed later that night, I was still seething with anger. I'm probably going insane. But can you blame me? I opened up the nightstand and got out a gun that my husband bought. Said he bought it for protection. Yeah right. He only bought it to threaten me and terrify me. I readied the gun and aimed it at his head. Thoughts of the great memories I had at my job and with my mother began to run through my mind and tears began to roll my cheeks, despair and desperateness clutching at my heart. I had to end this cycle of pain. I had to. It's the only way to gain freedom. I pulled the trigger, shooting my husband in the head. He was dead. I felt many things. But at the same time, I felt elated. I felt free. Sure I committed murder and may go to jail but it's a small price to pay. I just freed myself from an immoral husband. I freed myself from a life filled with pain and prolonged misery. It's time for my new life to begin.